Huh?, I thought, but I said, "I'm still in your stake. Boise East."
"Oh," he said, a bit embarrassed, although why he should be I don't know, because, as I said to him, "That's okay. I'm sure you don't know my name, and I don't know yours." I thought that would ease his obvious discomfort. But he went ahead and made himself more uncomfortable. At least what he said next should have.
"Well, didn't you used to be Sister Hessing?"
Now, I'll give you a minute to ponder that.
* * *
Many things came into my mind. Like,
What on earth kind of a question is that? I mean, really, what kind of a question is that, "Did I used to be . . . ?"
How old do I look?
Do you go to stake conference, Brother Whoever you are? Did you see me lead the music two months ago?
And did you used to be someone?
And I could have said many things, too. Like, "Yes, I used be twenty years older than I am now. It's a miracle." Or, "Yes, I used to be Sister Hessing, and then I died, and now I'm me." Or, "Yes, and before that I was . . . " You could probably think of other things to say. I did.
And I could have said many things, too. Like, "Yes, I used be twenty years older than I am now. It's a miracle." Or, "Yes, I used to be Sister Hessing, and then I died, and now I'm me." Or, "Yes, and before that I was . . . " You could probably think of other things to say. I did.
But what I said was, "No, I never was Sister Hessing." Pause. "She's dead, you know."
There was nothing I could say to ease his discomfort now. Well, there was one thing, so I said it, and it worked. "Jim and June (Hessing) used to be my next door neighbors, though."
Then he asked my name. I told him, and he told me his name, which I'll leave out of this story for his protection. After all, his question was really stupid, and I'm sure he doesn't see himself as a stupid man.
By the way, in case you didn't know it, I hate being taken for someone twenty years older than me. And hate is not a strong enough word for how I feel.
Do I look like I'm in my nineties? Good heavens, I hope not.
Do I look anything like June Hessing? NO! And, besides, she's dead, has been dead about four years. He should keep up with these things.
Do I look like I'm in my nineties? Good heavens, I hope not.
Do I look anything like June Hessing? NO! And, besides, she's dead, has been dead about four years. He should keep up with these things.
3 comments:
This Is Hilarious.
i can't explain why he thought you "used to be" someone else.
but think for a minute that it's possible that he hadn't seen sister hessing for years and years. maybe more than 10 years, given that she moved down to utah something like that long ago. and that would mean that when he saw her, she wasn't 20 years old than you are now.
i assure you that he wasn't thinking of how old you look in comparison to anything or anyone when he said what he said.
The only excuse I can think of for him is he's a man. And notices things about like the bark on a tree notices the tree.
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